Emotion recognition in textual conversations (ERTC) plays an important role in a wide range of applications, such as opinion mining, recommender systems, and so on. ERTC, however, is a challenging task. For one thing, speakers often rely on the context and commonsense knowledge to express emotions; for another, most utterances contain neutral emotion in conversations, as a result, the confusion between a few non-neutral utterances and much more neutral ones restrains the emotion recognition performance. In this paper, we propose a novel Knowledge Aware Incremental Transformer with Multi-task Learning (KAITML) to address these challenges. Firstly, we devise a dual-level graph attention mechanism to leverage commonsense knowledge, which augments the semantic information of the utterance. Then we apply the Incremental Transformer to encode multi-turn contextual utterances. Moreover, we are the first to introduce multi-task learning to alleviate the aforementioned confusion and thus further improve the emotion recognition performance. Extensive experimental results show that our KAITML model outperforms the state-of-the-art models across five benchmark datasets.